Bank Robber

 

Good day to be a good guy.  I started my day off with arresting a wanted rapist.  No bail nationwide extradition felony warrant.  The guy was 5’11” and 275lbs.  When I found him he was driving a car, but decided to park, when the marked police car pulled in behind him.  Funny how that happens.

 

I always tend to take an interest in people, who try to drive away from me, or quickly park.  I contact the guy in a friendly manner, “Hiya.  So whatcha doing?”  I mean he’s parking in an industrial section of town, no residential living, no businesses open.  He shows signs of being nervous, so I check further and find the warrant. 

 

It always amuses me, when someone will say that we’re harassing them.  Ummm…Not really.  We’re just paid to be curious, which means we ask questions. 

 

The next good call was a bank robbery, where a gun was implied.  I get there within a minute and walk up under I-5 to see if I can find the bad guy, who took off on foot.  A few officers, just North of me, end up finding the coat the bad guy wore, when holding up the bank.  I move North and a few minutes later a subject is seen running away from us.  Too bad for him he runs into a dead end.

 

He tries to run back, but is met by some officers holding shotguns, automatic rifles, and handguns.  After he’s in cuffs I walk the witness up and she goes, “Oh yea!  That’s him!”  Sweet!!!  I think I’ve only been involved in the arrest (of a bank robber) about half a dozen times in my 15 years. 

 

The bad guy robbed the bank of $300!  <laughing>  That’s worth a felony?  Wow….

 

J

Concerned citizen.

 

So I was sitting in a parking lot, in my marked police car, enjoying my lunch break, when a citizen rides up on a bicycle.  He proceeds to tell me that he spotted a transient sleeping in the bushes, and is concerned about his welfare.  He says, “Officer you may want to check on him.”  I look at him, giving my best “are you an idiot” look, and remain quiet.  I’m hoping that the silence will scare him away, but he persists.  “Officer he wasn’t moving or anything.”

 

So I say, “Ok.  Did you try to wake him?” and of course he didn’t try that.  He just assumes the guy might be dead, and I should check on him.  Never mind the fact that there’s about a hundred transients sleeping in the bushes, alleys, door alcoves, and dumpsters, all within 2 city blocks!  I give him a warm fuzzy and tell him that I’ll have another officer check on the guy. 

 

He peddles off feeling like he saved the world.  Idiot.

 

So I get back to the rest of my lunch break, and a car pulls alongside me.  “Officer.  Everyday I drive to work and people always run the red light at that intersection (nodding his head towards the nearest intersection).”  He continues to tell me that the city needs to crack down on motorists, who run red lights.  “Yeah…Ok, buddy.  I’ll get right on that!”  I actually tell him, “You know…I’ve been hit three times by motorists running red lights.  Until they give an IQ test for a driving license it’s going to continue to happen.” 

 

He tells me that I should park at the intersection and write tickets.  I want to explain to him that there are only 4 cops covering all of South downtown.  We’re a little busy answering 911 calls and answering felony crimes.  If we’re not arresting people for possession of small amounts of crack cocaine.  Do you really think we’re going to spend the energy on traffic code??? 

 

I take a political approach, “Ok.  That sounds like a good idea.  I’ll get on it on my free time, when I’m not on a lunch break, or answering a felony call.”  He smiles and drives off.  Another idiot saving the world.

 

J

You can run, but you can’t hide…sort of.

 

So I had myself a busy morning today.  Arrested lots of bad guys and found the suspect vehicle in a hit and run accident too.  Hit and run accidents are like a pet peeve of mine.  I hate the fact that someone, who is at fault, runs away, when they have the means to make it right.  A drug dealer?  Ok, I can understand why they run.  Someone who has insurance and a job?  What the hell?!

 

This woman was trying to park and hit another parked car.  Pretty good hit.  She gets out, looks at the damage, and then drives away.  I’m in the area and thinking to myself, “Ok, she was parking, so chances are she’s downtown for a reason.  Probably parked somewhere close by.”  Sure enough I find it one block away! 

 

I really do enjoy finding the suspect vehicle, because I get to impound them, and hold them till I find the suspect.  <insert evil laugh>  The registered owner lives just outside of Seattle, so I hope to drive there at the start of my next shift.  Always fun to knock on a door at 3:30 in the morning. 

 

J

Can’t fix stupid!

 

Ok, I’d like to think that most firefighters are slightly above average intelligence.  Then again, who the hell runs INTO a burning house?! 

 

I responded to a police call of, “Violent mentally ill person inside hitting walls, breaking windows, and thrashing self against the floor…Seattle Fire will stand by till scene secure.”  The last part is famous last words.  It seems that more often than not the firefighters rush in to a dangerous POLICE situation, instead of waiting for us to do our jobs.

 

I arrived on the call, about 10 seconds after it came out, and kept the home under watch till my back up arrived.  That’s an IQ test.  Only the idiots rush in alone.  So I’m watching and waiting and I see the 911 caller step out of the house.  He’s waiting outside, I’m waiting outside, and in rolls a Medic One unit.  They drive right up and start a conversation with the guy. 

 

Thankfully, my back up was still a ways out, two motorcycle officers happened along.  We check it out and clear the call, but I was like, “Ok.  So if crazy guy wanted death by cop, say run outside with a knife, and there’s no cops, but a few firefighters.  Do you think crazy, suicidal guy, is going to make the leap of logic and call off the attack/suicide?”  NO!  He’s going to take a few firefighters with him!

 

This reminded me of another idiotic situation some years back.  A call came out, “Mentally ill, suicidal subject, in house with compound bow, and knives, threatening to kill family and self….Seattle Fire standing by till scene secure.”  I arrive and wait a block out, for back up, and sure enough a big old fire truck drives and parks right in front of the house!  I haul ass to the front, just as the firefighters are knocking on the front door.

 

The crazy guy has the door open 2 inches, and is talking with the firefighters.  According to the call there’s two children inside, which is later confirmed, and I can’t see this guys hands.  The firefighters are trying to talk him into opening the door, there’s a small chain engaged, and I push my way to the front.  Time for a little police action!

 

I kick the door and force the guy back until we hit wall.  I let him know that I am in charge and take control of him.  I cuff him up, just as my back up arrives, and notice that the guy has been slicing his legs with a knife.  The compound bow, with arrows, is sitting on the table next to the door and two small kids are huddled on the couch. 

 

I’m talking with the other officer, while Seattle Fire checks on the subjects injuries.  Then it gets even nuttier.  The lieutenant of the fire engine gives the subject some prescription medications!  I ask him what the heck he’s doing and he tells me his son has the same mental condition, and that the pills will make him right. 

 

Hey bozo!  Do you know if maybe he’s already overdosed on meds?!  And that maybe you’re making things worse?  If maybe you’re giving him some lethal, because he’s got illegal drugs in his system too?  I was so upset that I called my sarge to scene and even filed a complaint with Seattle Fire higher ups.  I don’t know what became of it, but I hope someone gave the lieutenant an education. 

 

Whew!  Ok.  All done venting…

 

J

I've been taking a lot of time off from work, so there's been nothing to type about.  I could tell some old war stories, but who wants to talk shop, when you're on vacation???